To whose influence are you most open? Who can tell you just about anything and you gladly listen to them? Are they not the same people in whose presence you enjoy being?
Does the person that you want to influence seeks your presence or avoids it? If he avoids you then most likely he/she will avoid your influence as well. If he is communicating to you to leave him alone, then the best thing you can do for him and yourself is to assure them, if possible, of your love and concern for them and then give them full freedom.
You can influence them only when they seek you out for your input into their life. I am not talking about infants here but even with them, they accept your guidance when they want you.
Develop into the kind of a person that they will enjoy being with. Be just the listener if that is all they would like you to be, for now, and do not give them you opinion or advice unless they ask you for it or you could carefully ask them for permission to share with them what is on your heart or mind.
If they do not want to hear it, then they would not pay attention to your wisdom anyway, especially if you try to force it on them. Do everything possible not to awaken their resistance to what your say or to your presence.
Would you not feel the same if someone infringes on your freedom of being and doing what you like? Unless, of course, you have asked them to disciple you, then you would be on their side working against the resistance within you.
You are wasting your time advising them, unless the person trusts you and believes that you desire them good and sees that you have something of value to add to his own wisdom. Unless they desire your help, do not offer it to them, it’s counterproductive.
There are no exceptions. If you think you know of some examples then look again and you would probably see that it is just an appearance. There is more to it than what it is on the surface.
Person values nothing more than his freedom. To survive, he may temporally go along with some limitation on his freedom but only for a time, until he can attain as much freedom as he possibly can. Do you not do the same? Then what makes you think that in this aspect the other person is different?
In relationships, the most beautiful satisfaction, joy and love are experienced when there is full freedom, without any fear and addiction.
To achieve such relationships, one needs to trust Life and work on himself, so as to be able to give to others what he wants for himself and not be demanding. We are mirroring to one another our inner states. Smile and most will smile back to you.
Love is freedom! If you love someone; and he wants to leave you – let him go; and if he comes back to you later and you want him back then enjoy him, but only for the period of time that he would enjoy being with you and you with him.
Wouldn’t you like to have such a freedom also? So, then give it to others and it will be given to you. That is the Law of Life.
